Sunday, June 8, 2008

June---

June is an important month for me. It was June of the year 1984 I gained control over my life and became sober. So- 24 years. Hah! Next year is the big year- 25 years of wishing I was drunk- yes it never goes away. I always thought it was in September, but that’s when my original divorce started, and I didn’t make this life altering decision until the next June.

A lot ha been said and written on this very site about sobriety. Not unless you have been through it, had that devil monkey nipping at your back every day you don’t understand all the nuances nuisances of living sober everyday- for everyday can be a struggle. Even after 24 years.

So with that being said- I SHOULD post tales of how I had to cope and the good times I missed out on because I know even ONE drink will do me in. That’s’ how close to the edge I’ve always been- one drink and I’d wake up three-six-nine months or even a year later and wondered what happened.

But 26 is awfully young to realize this problem. I wonder what I was thinking back then—I look at my older kids, 28 and 26 and wonder if they could make a descion like that if they saw the self-destruction I was going through.

Anyway- I thought I’d share an important anniversary in my life, and I SHOULD share some stories, but I don’t think anyone will be interested.

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